Satire · HSK 6

The Wealth Guru

A speaker charges a fortune to teach the world how to get rich—until an elderly student asks one question that drops the whole auditorium into dead silence.

A Seminar for a Thousand

下,王启明甩了甩西装袖子,台下黑压压坐满了人。

guāngdēngxiàwángmíngshuǎileshuǎizhuāngxiùtáixiàhēizuòmǎnlerén

Under the spotlight, Wang Qiming gave his suit sleeves a flick. Below the stage, a dense sea of people filled every seat.

Wang Qiming

各位,财富不是省出来的,是脑子里想出来的!

wèicáishìshěngchūláideshìnǎoxiǎngchūláide

Everyone, wealth isn't something you save your way into—it's something you think your way into!

大屏幕上滚动着他的豪车、海景别墅和遍布全国的分公司。

píngshànggǔndòngzhedeháochēhǎijǐngbiéshùbiànquánguódefēngōng

Scrolling across the big screen were his luxury cars, his oceanfront villa, and branch offices spread across the entire country.

Wang Qiming

三年前我也,靠的就是这套思维,谁学谁发财!

sānniánqiánsuǒyǒukàodejiùshìzhètàowéishuíxuéshuícái

Three years ago I had nothing either. All I relied on was this mindset—whoever learns it gets rich!

台下掌声雷动,不少人当场就掏出手机了。

táixiàzhǎngshēngléidòngshǎoréndāngchǎngjiùtāochūshǒusǎobàomíngle

The crowd burst into thunderous applause, and quite a few people whipped out their phones on the spot to scan the code and sign up.

The Hundred-Thousand-Yuan Package

中场休息时,助理小李把一份合同悄悄递到前排。

zhōngchǎngxiūxishízhùxiǎofèntongqiāoqiāodàoqiánpái

During the intermission, his assistant Xiao Li quietly slipped a contract down to the front row.

Xiao Li

这是终极弟子班,名额只剩三个,十万一位,错过就没了。

zhèshìzhōngbānmíngézhīshèngsānshíwànwèicuòguòjiùméile

This is the elite inner-circle class—only three spots left, a hundred thousand each. Miss it and it's gone.

一个戴老花镜的退休教师举着合同,翻来覆去看了好几遍。

dàilǎohuājìngdetuìxiūjiàoshīzhetongfānláikànlehǎobiàn

A retired teacher in reading glasses held up the contract, turning it over and over and reading it several times.

Retired Teacher

王老师赚得,怎么还天天忙着收这点学费呢?

wánglǎoshīzhuànpénmǎnmǎnzěnmeháitiāntiānmángzheshōuzhèdiǎnxuéfèine

Mr. Wang's raking it in hand over fist—so why is he still busy day after day collecting these little tuition fees?

小李愣了愣,干笑两声,赶紧把话题岔了过去。

xiǎolènglelènggānxiàoliǎngshēnggǎnjǐnhuàchàleguò

Xiao Li froze for a moment, forced out a couple of dry laughs, and hurriedly steered the conversation elsewhere.

The Question in the Hall

下半场提问环节,那位退休教师慢悠悠地站了起来。

xiàbànchǎngwènhuánjiéwèituìxiūjiàoshīmànyōuyōuzhànlelái

During the Q&A in the second half, that retired teacher rose unhurriedly to his feet.

Retired Teacher

王老师,您的思维既然这么值钱,自己不就行了?

wánglǎoshīníndewéiránzhèmezhíqiánmēnshēngcáijiùxíngle

Mr. Wang, if your mindset is really worth so much, why not just quietly get rich off it yourself?

Retired Teacher

何必费这么大劲,把它一遍遍卖给我们这些呢?

fèizhèmejìnbiànbiànmàigěimenzhèxiēwàihángne

Why go to all this trouble selling it over and over to amateurs like us?

全场骤然安静下来,几千双眼睛望向台上。

quánchǎngzhòuránānjìngxiàláiqiānshuāngyǎnjīngshuāshuāwàngxiàngtáishàng

The whole hall fell abruptly silent, and thousands of pairs of eyes turned as one toward the stage.

王启明脸上的笑容僵了一瞬,话筒里传出一阵刺耳的杂音。

wángmíngliǎnshàngdexiàoróngjiāngleshùnhuàtǒngchuánchūzhèněrdeyīn

The smile on Wang Qiming's face froze for an instant, and a burst of harsh static screeched out of the microphone.

The Notice at the Back Door

他干咳一声,硬挤出一句“财富要靠分享才能放大”,便匆匆宣布散场。

gānshēngyìngchūcáiyàokàofēnxiǎngcáinéngfàngbiàncōngcōngxuānsànchǎng

He cleared his throat and forced out a line—"Wealth can only multiply when it's shared"—then hastily declared the session over.

散场后,退休教师扶着栏杆下楼,无意间走到了后门。

sànchǎnghòutuìxiūjiàoshīzhelángānxiàlóujiānzǒudàolehòumén

After it ended, the retired teacher made his way downstairs holding the railing and, by chance, wandered over to the back door.

墙上贴着一张,红章盖在“场地租金逾期”几个字上。

qiángshàngtiēzhezhāngcuīkuǎntōngzhīhóngzhānggàizàichǎngjīnshàng

Pasted on the wall was an overdue-payment notice, a red stamp pressed over the words "venue rent past due."

王启明正背对着他,对着电话压低嗓子央求再宽限三天。

wángmíngzhèngbèiduìzheduìzhediànhuàsǎngziyāngqiúzàikuānxiànsāntiān

Wang Qiming had his back to him, lowering his voice into the phone, pleading for just three more days' grace.

老人摇摇头,把那份十万的合同轻轻塞进了路边的垃圾桶。

lǎorényáoyáotóufènshíwàndetongqīngqīngsāijìnlebiāndetǒng

The old man shook his head and gently tucked that hundred-thousand-yuan contract into a roadside trash bin.

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